CD 4

I'm sitting at CD 4. The next time I see CD 4 I should be starting C*omid. Holy Cow. It felt like a million years away and now we're almost at the starting line for this once in a lifetime do-over. The "last" vial all over again. I can't believe it.

There have been several times throughout the last 2 months where I wasn't sure this would happen. So many reasons have raced through my mind about waiting and not waiting. Do I dare attempt single motherhood with two children? Do I wait so my child(ren) can have two parents? Is this fair to my son? What happens if my pregnancy is one big catastrophy? What if something goes horribly wrong? I don't know, but my ideal in terms of where my son and I sit...I want him to have someone to walk this life with, someone he can rant and rave with about their crazy mom, someone who understands what it's like to have no father, but a donor.  Someone he can have that unimaginable bond with.

So, here I go, almost. My last attempt at my single parent dream of giving my son someone who he can grow up and old with that shares his full genetic make up.